☆No More Sweets for Me ☆

So much for tommorrow being better.

Wed, 06 Aug 2008 02:37:51 GMT

binge
6 poptarts
1 fried mandu
2 steamed mandu
3 pieces lemon cake
1 jello cup
4 koolaid juice icees

Should it be humanly possible for one girl to be able to eat so much (and that's not counting breakfast)?
I feel disgusting.
I feel like my entire body is just twitching with the desire to go to the bathroom and get rid of it
But I won't. I'm stronger then this. I've proven that time and time again.
Only it feels worse somehow now
who stocked this house with junkfood anyway >=(

03

Tue, 05 Aug 2008 02:42:11 GMT

::sigh:: Today was bad
I don't think I went over 1800 calories.
BUT I definatly went over 1500.
Today was my uncles birthday and the day before my grandma went back to Spain
sooo. There was food. a lot of it.
Granted I didn't go overboard but I just know it wasn't healthy.
And I also ate 3 pop tarts.
And I wanted to work out but an old friend stopped by since she was in town and we talked until 10!
So time was completly wasted (not that I didn't enjoy hanging out with her)
Tommorrow will be a better day.
::sigh:: since when did I become an expert on tommorrows
=(
I'm running out of time !!

01

Mon, 04 Aug 2008 01:17:13 GMT

calories
1 asiago bagel with creamcheese (390)
10 croutons (50)
1 koolaid icee (200)
1 turkey patty with white rice & broccilli (440)
1 slice ginger cake (220)

Total : 1300

exactly 100 calories over.
ugh.

Water Intake: (x)(x)(x)(x)(x)(x)(x)(x)
Green Tea Intake: ( )( )
Honey/cinnamon drink: (x)

I'm starting this honey/cinnamon drink mixture that is supposed to help you lose weight/be healthier
It sounds kind of too good to be true to me (the whole lose weight part)
but I mean...what harm can it do?
It's just honey, ground cinnamon, and water.

I've also been severly limiting my rice intake.
Today was the first time in a month that I've had any.
It's easy to do now since I'm not at home with my parents but I know once I return it's going to be hard(er).
I'll manage.

00

Sun, 03 Aug 2008 02:16:33 GMT

calories

1 plain bagel w/ cream cheese (340)
1 diet coke (0)
1 bottle sparkling water (0)
1 botle of water (0)
1 serving dennys hashbrowns (218)
1 moons over my hammy (807) < yikes!
Total 1365

aish...
well. since today was saturday I'll take it as a test run
Tommorrow is when the week starts and when everything has to be perfect.
I'll stick to my plan. HWAITING!

Here we go again. ha ha

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 04:09:15 GMT

It's August and I think I'm finally ready to buckle down.
I've been reading a lot of books and talking to different people and just trying to figure out what will work the best for me and won't bore me etc. etc.
I don't only want to change my weight but my physical appearance and inside too. I want to be the most beautiful person I can be both inside and out. Why waste life being anything but?
And I want to earn it all myself =D

I would love to loose 2o pounds, but if that's impossible-- oh well.
I decided that since it's crunch time I'm going to work out every day (especially seeing as how I have the time)
but once school starts I'll decrease to 3-4 times a week.
My plan will include

* stretches
* 1-2 dance routines
* 2oo jumpropes
* 3o minutes of cardio
* pilates
* 8oo - 12oo calories a day
* update this journal every day
* face mask 2 times a week
* 2 cups of green or oolong tea a day
* 8 glasses of water a day
* 7-1o hours of sleep a night

Enough talking, time to start doing !

Reward to myself?
If I can stick to this plan everyday without messing up more then once until christmas, I can go to Korea.
& if I lose 15 lbs by the end of the summer I will buy that cute betsey johnson dress♥

I think that's fair =D
Here we go~HWAITING!

HWAITING!!

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 13:15:04 GMT

It's summer.
No vending machines
No late nights, no all nighters
No more excuses.

Today was a good day =D

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 01:09:20 GMT

1 cup honey bunches of oats cereal w/ skim milk 160
1 sugar free redbull 10
1 banana 90
1 chicken sandwhich 2301 banana 90
1 cup split pea soup w/ garlic bread 365
1 bowl honey bunches of oats cereal w/ skim milk 160
Total 1105

+ 30 minute treamill workout

Thu, 19 Jun 2008 01:25:49 GMT

Today I went to the doctor
she told me I was 10 lbs overweight
and to lose it by my next appointment with her
which is in 2 months.
Are you supposed to lose weight at that pace?
Well, I mean, she is a doctor.
I'll lose her 10lbs
and then lose and extra 10
then I'll be satisfied ha ha

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 22:56:14 GMT

Today was such a hard exam
Then again~science was never my thing =(
I'm nearly 100% positive I failed. I usually leave all the questions I don't absolutely know blank and go back later.
When I went back over half the test was still blank ::sigh::
Oh well.

Eating wise~I'm not sure how I did today. I planned on meeting up with some friends at 9 at a new diner that opened up, but I woke up at 6 (damn internal clock >=o) so I was hungry by like 8, so I had a glass of skim milk (90) then, at the diner I ordered a vegetarian omelett with homefries and ordered an orange juice~but ended up just drinking the water. I'm not sure how many calories are in that however~I can assume it was high. I also had a bottle of sprite zero and 2 servings of cheetos (320) waiting around and studying with my classmates on the courtyard before the exam (friends are the biggest enablers I swear! lol) and a peanut butter sandwhich on wheatbread (280) and another glass of skim milk (90).

That makes my total~without the diner food 780. I can only imagine the diner food as adding probably another 700 calories so I'll estimate my days calories as being 1480.

Tommorrow I have a doctors appointment~which probably means, s u p e r o f f i c i a l w e i g h i n
gahh~I'm nervous !

I dissapeared

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 01:01:28 GMT

ha ha yea. Exams are coming to a close. I have only 3 more and then it's officially summer vacation!
Let's hope I pass all of them so that it can stay summer vacation ha ha
of my goals for last week

o1 Excercise @ least 3 times
o2 Take the stairs rather than the elevator at least 3 times this week
o3 Update this journal every day
o4 Write down everything I eat/don't forget to eat
o5 Have at most 24 ounces of soda (I'm taking this slowly)/find an alternative
o6 Don't spend more then $40

I only accomplished those 2
I have the same goals for this week~I will definatly achieve at least HALF of them (well...maybe not 6 seeing as how I've already spent over 40 today ). Especially now since I have~ m o t i va t io n .

TA DA! It's the Evening Rose Garden Strapless dress from Betsey Johnson!
The new love of my life ha ha.
I would like to be able to wear this at the end of the summer and look amazing in it!
SO. I'm going to buy it at the size I want to be~and then I'll be more motivated to get to that size!
The price will be...about half of my summer allowance ($425) but it'll be worth it!!
Definatly worth it!
I don't do anything over the summer anyway...so this is fine right?

I think I also want to get the club application from the administration office and look into the possibilty of starting a tennis club in my school. I originally wanted to join a sport~but all we have are basketball, volleyball, softball, and bowling. I wouldn't have fun with those~but tennis is fun and active! Plus, I know a bunch of people who would definatly want to join.

Next year will not be like this year~where I fell right back into my old habits once the summer ended.
Weight loss will stay off and my lifestyle will be a healthy one.

HWAITING~! =D

13

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 21:35:53 GMT

1 sesame seed bagel w/ 2 table spoons creamcheese         380
1 cup coffe w/ whole milk and 3 teaspoons of sugar          77
1 turkey sandwhich on wheat bread          265
1 serving harvest cheder sunchips          140
1 bottle of water          0
1 celeste pizza for one          410
1 cup grape juice          120

Total          1392

WELL. It's not below the 12oo mark, but it is me eating 3x a day~which is very rare.
I usually grab something for breakfast and buy something from the vending machine when I can't hear myself think because of my stomach rumbling but today I made sure to eat lunch and drink.....NO SODA! It was so difficult choosing water but totally worth it. I feel very proud!
And I've drank (drunken?) so much water today! It's so hot outside~it's not even summer yet! Everyone was sweating and uncomfortable~no one could focus in class, even the teachers were unable to function properly.
Ha, I'm going to lose weight twice as fast for sweating so much ha ha xD
~~I wish lol~~

12

Sun, 08 Jun 2008 18:33:39 GMT

I've been doing a lot of thinking these few days.
Like, I'm happiest and the most confident when I'm excercising and eating right. When I overcome little challenges in not eating/drinking that or pushing myself to get off my butt and excercise I feel really good but when I do give in and don't get up I feel really down. I feel lazy and gross and just unhappy with myself.
So why do I keep doing it? Why do people chose a moments gratification over something that means so much more? Where's the sense in that?

I'm pushing for too much too soon I think, I'm expecting eating right automatically equaling looking great and that automatically equaling being happy and satisfied.

I'm going to take things slow and steady. Day by day. I'm not going to start over because I haven't been keeping tabs on myself~I'm going to take each day like it comes. Today after yesterday and not try to make it seem like yesterday or the day before that or the day before that didn't happen and doesn't matter. Today is day 12 and even if I haven't made much physical progress~I think my mental progress and maturity has actually been quite immense ♥

SO. I'm going to make practical and realistic goals for this week:

o1 Excercise for 30 minutes @ least 3 times
o2 Take the stairs rather than the elevator at least 3 times this week
o3 Update this journal every day
o4 Write down everything I eat/don't forget to eat
o5 Have at most 24 ounces of soda (I'm taking this slowly)/find an alternative
o6 Don't spend more then $40
I think my hardest goals to stick to will probably be number 2 and number 6. In the morning taking the stairs down is no trouble...it's coming up in the afternoon/evening that really will be a problem. And...I always manage to spend so much money every week, and leave with nothing to show for it! I can't even tell you what I spent $78 on last week, but I did manage to spend $78 ::sigh::

It'll be hard but I can definatly do it! HWAITING! hee hee =D

Keep going strong~we'll difinatly reach our goals in no time !!

o8

Wed, 04 Jun 2008 21:14:59 GMT

These past few days have been filled with pizza and pepsi.
My calories have remained under 15oo tho, which isn't good, but not too terrible either.

After school we went into a store. I got up the courage to try on a dress I thought was cute...
and it looked terrible.
And my two friends who I was with who are both cute and petite looked amazing in everything, and they were switching clothes/sharing
and it just motivated me more to want to do this for myself.
so I can go shopping in a good mood, and leave shopping in an even better one, rather than in a down mood.

According to todays News, drinking from a water bottle will give you wrinkles.
=.= don't they have anything else they could talk about?

o3

Fri, 30 May 2008 00:53:20 GMT

Todays Calories

1 cup sierra mist    100
same cookie thingys from yesterday (still don't know what they're called)   250
1 slice pizza (ugh.)   500
1 cup wild rice 166
1 apple   80

Total 1096

To me...wild rice is really gross ha ha. I didn't like it at all.
I never want to eat it again~although I'm sure it's a much healthier alternative to white ::sigh::
I really need to start eating healthier. I don't eat that much~but everything I eat is always junk!
With finals drawing near I find eating falling lower and lower on my priority list.
I stayed after school for tutoring and didn't get near home till around 7!
Then~rather than do the responsible thing I went to Sbarros with friends for dinner x.x
AND I felt bad because my mom cooked~so I ate some rice. Some nasty rice.

ah~this is not really going well =(

o2

Wed, 28 May 2008 22:03:15 GMT

Todays Calories

1 serving cheerios with skim milk    150
1 bag strawberry cookie things (not sure what it is ha ha)    250
1 cup coffee with milk         30
1 turkey and cheese sandwhich    300
1 serving potatoe salad        358

Total   1088

Yesterday it was hot like a day in late June~and today it's really cold like a day in late September
And there's so much pollen flying around
no wonder I feel like crap ::sigh::

o1

Tue, 27 May 2008 23:03:10 GMT

Today's Calories

1 serving cheerios w/ skim milk        160
1/2 pack of twizzlers            140
1 diet pepsi                0
1 cup coffee w/ hazelnut creamer    80
1 microwave dinner (bbq chicken)    250
2 fig newtons                140
1 cup pineapple                74

Total                    844

I also did I 10 minute pilates video and some stretches as excercise.
Tommorrow I'm going to workout on the treadmill and the next day more pilates and stretches.
You know, I kind of like the fat jokes
Gives me motivation =D
ha ha.

I am back

Mon, 26 May 2008 22:04:06 GMT

with a vengence
No more excuses. I'm only holding myself back, and that's stupid. There are plenty of people out there who will try and hold you back, to add yourself to that list is ridiculous.

I fixed up my layout today =D
I noticed I'm a lot more inclined to use something once I've customized it. I actually started out going for something much more bright...but it somehow turned into this ha ha It's featuring the wondergirls

Seeing as how it may be impossible for me to update everyday I bought a little notebook I could carry around with me so I can write down everything I eat, that way when I do get to go online I can have everything there rather than having to skip days or giving up because I've fallen to far behind.

I'm going to try very hard ♥

I want to be able to wear knee socks with my uniform on beautiful days like today and shorts in the summer. I want to be able to look at myself in the mirror and like what I see. I want to be able to go out to a restaurant and make the right choices, to not come home g u i l t y. I want to be confident and happy and not worry about what's going through everyone's heads when I walk into a room.

Most of all, I want to be able to say that I made a choice, a decision and followed through with it. I want to be able to say that I did something with no help from anyone. I want to be able to say I accomplished something through my own hard work and determination.

hwaiiitttiiiiiiinnnnnngggggggg~!!!

hee hee~good news however. I am down to 160. 6 lbs down since when I've started. that gives me hope ha ha =D

Wed, 14 May 2008 00:09:24 GMT

Plain bagel with jelly
280
1 cup fruit punch
120
1 bag cookies
240
1 bag chedder sunchips
160
1 hagen daaz ice cream bar
160
1 turkey burger
360
Total
1320

So. My day wasn't terrible but it wasn't good either...I didn't eat a lot~but all I ate was junk! This is a typical day in my life. I started off the morning fully intentioning to do a great job today but instead ended up only eating crap. I missed lunch so just bough a bag of cookies from the vending machine on my way to class~and then didn't end up leaving school untill 5:30 so I ended up buying a bag of sunchips from the vending machine to curb my hunger too =[ I wish my school was like those public schools that have vending machines that only sell healthy stuff~I mean...These machines don't even have granola bars!!

Afterwards my dad picked me up from school and bought me~ice cream x.x.

I want to go shopping soon so that I can buy stuff to take with me to school that way when I'm there I won't fall prey to the evil that is the vending machine.

Any suggestions? What do you guys usually carry around with you when you know you won't have time to actually sit and eat?

Tommorrow is my honor ceremony. I wished to be 155 pounds by then but alas~unless I can drop 8 lbs in a night, that's not happening xD. Oh well. I'm happy with the weight I lost and I'll continue to move forward. I won't let myself get depressed about the fact that I haven't lost weight because that will ruin my day (and my new, 1 size smaller gorgeous dress =D).

Stay strong everyone ♥

Tue, 13 May 2008 01:17:44 GMT

Now that all the serious exams are (for the most part) over I plan on seriously tackling keeping a daily food log of what I eat!
No more excuses or anything~and if I can't get to a computer I'll jott it down on a piece of paper to update later.
WHOo~LET'S DO THIS! ha ha

TODAY

1 bagel with jelly
280
1 bag pretzels
160
1 bowl captain crunch
160
1 serving egg plant parmasian
350
32 ounces of water
0
1 cup coffee [w/ milk and sugar]
62
Total

1012

I should probably eat something else...but I'm too tired to bother searching through the junk in my kitchen for the healthy choice...and I don't want to make the easy choice (ie grab that moon pie) so I think I'm just going to listen to my body for once and fall into bed happily ha ha.

YAY!

Sun, 04 May 2008 12:58:34 GMT

I lost 3 lbs!!!
I can’t believe it. I was dreading stepping on the scale, but I knew I needed to to see where I was and~
BAM! 3lbs in the direction OPPOSITE where I thought it was going to be ha ha.

I’m really happy.

I haven’t really been paying much attention to what I’ve been eating~because I haven’t really had time. I’d been worrying about the SAT’s and preparing for the AP exams I have to take this week~but at the same time since I was so busy I didn’t have time to stuff my face with junk xD. I also was only able to work out for 3o minutes 3 days this week but IT WORKED! Just goes to show how much of a difference exercise really does make.

I think if I push push push myself for the 1o days I have left until the ceremony I may be able to loose 4 more lbs? Which will make my weight loss total by the time of the ceremony 7 lbs~Only 3 lbs off from my goal!

Whooo HWAITINGGGG~!!

I hope everyone else is doing fine♥ Don't give up~! We'll definatly do this !

UGH. Now back to those AP prep books ::cries::

Fri, 02 May 2008 09:54:42 GMT

ugh. Sorry I've been MIA for the past week. I mean to read my friends page and update every day but things just seem to be speeding up x.x TOMMORROW I take the SAT's and it seems everybody's freaking out. Our entire junior class (only about 1oo) is expected to get over a 18oo. I've used prep book after prep book and took practice tests and essays and learned words and stupid english rules and I still don't feel like I'm ready =( I hate stupid pressure. I pray I don't choke =x

As for eating I've been doing well and excercising regularly (although not every day) but I don't really see a change. In fact, I feel kind of blahh about the whole thing. I'm trying and not getting anywhere (which is very discouraging) but I haven't weighed myself yet so I'm not sure if it's my mood that's making me feel that way, or because it's true.

My goal for my induction ceremony (May 15) was to have lost 1o lbs...I don't think that's even possible anymore *sigh*

binge binge binge binge binge binge binge

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 23:08:19 GMT

Today was not a good day at all x.x
I ate and ate and ate so much crap. So pathetic. Why can't I just stop? Walk away? Don't do it? It sucks.

I had a few homemade sugar cookies
a pack of white chedder cheeseits
wendys (1o chicken nuggets, fries, and a coke)
an omlett
a handfull of pretzels
a ceaser salad
a moonpie
grape juice
a snapple
and a spoonfull of icecream.

I hate eating bad like that because it makes me feel sooo bad about myself. I feel like I can feel every inch of flab and fat thats hanging on my body x.x I hate it. Eating good makes me feel good about myself so you'd think I'd stick to that right? Maybe I'm some kind of masochist ha ha.

I'll try harder tommorrow.

ugh. I don't want to become a person full of "tommorrows". I don't want to always try harder tommorrow~I want to make today a good day.

I wish you could buy self control for 99 cents like you could junk food =[

Tue, 22 Apr 2008 22:50:00 GMT

1 bowl special k w/ skim milk 16o
1 homemade veggie delite 21o
6 cheesy tots 21o
1 package cookies 23o
1 package pretzels 12o
1 diet pepsi =[
1 serving pasta 2oo

Total 113o

Ah~I packed myself a lunch to take to school~and I was in such a rush today that I forgot it at home! Thus I fell pray to vending machine cookies and diet pepsi *cries*. AND I ended up eating the pretzels and sandwhich when I got home x.x But~I was still under 12oo calories so I'm happy.

I woke up early again today for 2o minutes and I'm going to do 2o more minutes when I finish my homework (and now that I've said it I have to do it!) That makes a total of 4o minutes ♥

Is it alright for me to break it up that way or is it more effective to just do it all at once? I'm worried I may be doing 4o minutes of excercise, but not getting the full effects if I would just do 4o straight. Is there a big difference?

Ah~sorry for my ridiculous question ha ha I'm new at this xD

Stay strong!

Tue, 22 Apr 2008 00:00:15 GMT

*sigh* my wireless is acting up sooo badly.
I worked out this morning =D I woke up 3o minutes earlier to work out for 2o minutes and I was suppossed to work out for 2o more minutes in the afternoon (for a total of 4o) but that may be impossible. Oh well. Tommorrows a new day. One step at a time♥

Calorie wise, I'm not too sure how I did. I know I didn't eat too bad though.

My goals for the rest of this month are as follows:
-Update everyday with calories/what I ate
-Work out for at least 3o minutes 4x a week
-Loose 5 lbs

I think I can do it~!

No more slacking!

Day o4

Fri, 18 Apr 2008 04:55:45 GMT

Today was a good day. I walked pretty much all around the city, and rather than opting for the public transportation route that would leave me infront of my house I opted for the one that would leave me farthest away so I would have to walk =D

Today's calories were as follows:
1 bagel w/ cream cheese 33o
1 granola bar 16o
1 bottle organic Limeade 1oo
1 serving beef stew and 1 cup white rice 42o
4 cookies 24o
1 serving tortilla chips 15o
Total 1240

Much better than yesterday! I went over by 4o~and I confess that those last 39o calories were just now...at 12:51 pm. DARN YOU LATE NIGHTS!

I've discovered the love of my life in healthy snacking however thanks to a coworker of my mother. homemade parfaitsss ♥ granola , yogurt, and fresh fruit. ahh love. Not only will it cure my sweet tooth but it won't make me feel guilty either.

Who said eating healthy was tedious?

Stay Strong =D